my space St.Methos

My head is spinning around.

So Many things happen to me in the last 2 months, is making me very confused

is like:

i want but i don't want

a lot but also not a lot

Shit

i have been a walking bomb ready to explode

ok im going o write down what happen

2 months and half a go i got envolved with a little selfish cooksucking bitch call Helenee,

i only got envolve with her because she came on to me, she was with someone at the time, she asked him a break time for her to think and then we got completly envolved. She should have break up completaly with him. A couple of days later he shows up in her apartment with me inside. fuck thats not good. in that moment i should see it comimg. a week later she says to me "why don't we move in together", (she was about leaving the apartment she was living and it was later that i saw she only said this for her pwn interrest, she had no where to go)and some how i said yes, i was never in love with her, but i know for someone to know better his/her partner is the best thing to do. i shorts time in knowing if it is the one.

i got an apartment a 3 bedroom apartment and we move in, after a week her brother shows up and they go to visit her other brother in Alentejo, they come back a 2 days later and they go on a trip to Spain for a week, fine by me. but in the moment she went with her brother her energy was different.

i know it was agressive the way we start the relation ship, but she only thinks about herself and nobody else.

She comes back and starts saying that she's been confused. and stuff like that.

she went with her 2 brothers to lissabon because they were flying to USA and she spent a extra day in Lissabon with a guy that ask her to marry him (just for him to have the visa to stay in the States) all this story stinks, he is gay she says, hey, he just turned gay some months ago and he just finished is first gay relationship.

she comes back and from lisabon with him, next day she says sometimes we need to sleep in diferent rooms, and she doesn't know what she wants. Fuck i should said in that moment, LEAVE NOW.

and she ask me for time.

i gave her time but i had to press her, we where living under the same roof and that was killing me.

than she says its better to break up, and she didn't say nothing about leaving the apartment, this was the moment i start getting confused.

2 days later we talked again and i said we should figure this out, (OH and before we actually start talking and having this kind of conversations she was already hanging aroung with some one, call Richard) so i said im going to be out for 2 nights and spending that time in my parents place. Ironies of live and fucking dejá vu i arrive home at 4am with my sister and i find her in bed with the guy i just mencioned. She didn't even respect the home i got and the feelings around.

i actually love this part, they got the scared of their lifes. the funny part is i couln't trought out, because some year's ago i was trown out from an place in one night, and took over a year to recover from that.

 this things got me even more confused.

one week later i tell her to leave because i finally saw a deceiving, liar, sellfish person she is, in that week she didn't do nothing to help in the apartment, always left every thing dirty even more than me. Im a sucker

i told her for her to give me the money she owns me, and she only gave part of it and said she would give the rest later, and she didn't, meanwhile she was trying to make me feel guilty, what a joke.

while i was working she managed to take every thing with the help of Richard (oh  didn't say after i trown the guy out he come more times to my apartment, how stupid can he be) when i said to her that nobody gets in side of the apartment.

and here is the moment that my HATE started, she took all the keys with her.

i felt so vunerable, so rapped, i couln'd work i was super nervous, because while i was at work she could come in and do something, i didn't trust her. fucking stupid bitch. i call her saying for to give the keys, and she was saying no, perhaps tomorrow, that's the moment i went ballistic, screaming at her, saying i was going to the police to report on her witch i did, and not long after she was on the way to deliver the keys in my post box when she sees my sister and hand over the keys all nervous.

She already left the country, and before she did she used Richard to help her, and she also didn't respect him, why i say this becuse she cheat on him 2 nights before she left, and in the next night she spend it with Richard,(i bet she didn't even changed the sheets) what a fucking cooksucking cunt. And she didn't even respect the friend (Stass) of her's that gave her a bed to sleep, Stass told her that she didn't want to be envolved in the things she does. Stass went balistic when she saw another men inside of the apartment instead of Richard telling her how selfish and desrespectfull she is, Stass haves no respect for her they didn't leave each other as friends, you know why? because Stass told me all this story.

this one is my favorite hate, and i would love to see her BURN, and about Richard it would another story.

The adventures we have in life and how after something that we can consider bad, can turn over whit others amazing ones.

its funny all this things can happen, and understand than can be a bit  confusing.